I knew he wanted it.
He certainly knew not to ask me for it, though. Even to suggest it risked dismissal and he definitely didn’t want that. But sometimes when we’d meet, he’d mention how he’d found an escort who also offered domination, at least that’s what her website said, and he was going to give it a shot. Again. Even though the variety of “domination” every escort he’d tried before never matched up to what he would get from his sexless time with me, his Grail-like quest propelled him to keep searching.
Still, he’d play with me when I asked him to and we both were grateful for what the other brought to the table. I got a play partner who would go wherever I thought to take him and he got the domination – sadistic, intense, demanding, connected dominance – that he craved beyond any vanilla sexual encounter.
So I don’t know what it was about that day, that moment, that made me say, “I’ll fuck you.” Maybe I just felt his need to intensify his masochistic surrender with the baser instincts of sexual pleasure more keenly. Maybe I just wanted a way to get him to stop making such goddam noise while I hurt him.
“If you can be quiet — absolutely, utterly silent — for the next 30 minutes while I torture you, I will fuck you.” He was pinned underneath me, my knees pressing into his chest. There was already a leather sheath lined with very sharp spikes wrapped around his hard cock. He’d been howling agonizingly every time I squeezed the shaft, pressing the metal tips in deeper. When I let go and dug my nails into his nipples, I was certain he’d wake the neighbors.
I leaned in close to his ear and repeated my offer, to make sure he’d heard me and make sure he believed me. “Not a sound. Not a moan. Not a grunt. Not a whimper. For thirty minutes. And I will hurt you for all that time. But if you stay completely silent through it, I will fuck you. I promise.”
And I meant it, though I knew there was no possibility he’d win, even if it meant I had to stick a 1.5″ needle directly in his testicle at 28:55 and then electrify it. I didn’t want it to come to that. I was pretty sure it wouldn’t.
I didn’t tell him any of this, but I didn’t have to. He knows me. He knew.
“Nod your head ‘Yes’ if you accept my offer.” He nodded. Of course. I know him, too.
He tried. He really did. His face contorted with pain as I pressed the spikes into his cock with my fist. I put the MEO ball stretcher around his scrotum and cranked it wide until his balls were livid with tension.
“Twenty minutes left,” I informed him as I brought out my single tail.
When the tip of the whip struck the head of his cock, followed immediately by a tag to his taut balls, he spasmed so violently from the pain he fell off the bed. I knelt close to him and chuckled, teasing, menacing, and low in his ear. “Oh, you DO want it, don’t you? You want it soooo bad.”
I stood up again and let him breathe. But just for a moment. “Fifteen minutes. Halfway there.”
He was half on the bed, half on the floor when I added the industrial nipple clamps. I squeezed one tighter then twisted it mercilessly with one hand and with my other hand squeezed those spikes hard into his cock whilst digging a ragged fingernail into his pink, exposed corona.
That did it.
“FUCK!!! FUCK!!!” he roared.
“Well, actually, no,” I corrected. “Not now,” I smiled. Victorious. “And not ever.”
snicker!
teehee! woohoo! poor sad little man.
At least he got a mind fuck.
The “Holy Grail” is amazing, but I can say that what you do is just as amazing.
Holy fuckin’ shit! That is priceless.
You just can’t make this shit up, that was awesome.
After reading this another title popped into my head:
“The Fabulous MEO Torture Tour – presented by the stunning Miss Troy Orleans”
Troy,
So often I read your writing and find myself torn between desire and fear. I don’t have much in the way of real experience, but this, this would certainly be far beyond anything I’ve considered – and it scares the shit out of me.
Not just because of the physical pain you inflicted, but more because of the mental anguish – toying with his ultimate desire and using it make him suffer. I can’t imagine dealing with the physical pain, but the mental pain would surely fry my brain. To be so close and fail, it’s worse than never having been close at all.
I wonder how he looks back on that experience? I’m guessing there are intense, mixed emotions swirling about inside of him when he remembers your promise, and his failure.
Powerful stuff.
Jeffrey
@MsWynter
Let’s just say I was very happy with how things turned out. 🙂
@nofear
I’ve had the Holy Grail and yeah, I definitely appreciate the appeal. On the other hand, I like to think that my play partners and I are able to achieve similar highs within our mutual boundaries. Glad you think so, too.
@heelvr
Why make things up when the truth is so hot?
@jeffrey
Your comment reminds me of when I was in college parsing texts and wondering if the author ever consciously thought about all the stuff we were asserting was embedded in the text. I can’t say I was thinking about mental anguish or being close and failing or promises. I really just needed him to be quieter. But it’s nice it worked out the way it did.
I’ve asked him to respond to this post (and perhaps even to your comment) like a reprisal of the “He Said, She Said” feature I did a while back. Cross your fingers.
I have been meaning to respond to this. I was the subject of MTO,s blogpost. Troy knows me very well. We have great chemistry together. It surprises me to this day that I love her so much because based on my fetishes, sexual desires, bdsm interests I would not think she would be the domme for me. However I have found my scenes with her to be like no other. It’s hard to explain. They are not like a normal session. The flow and vibe is almost always so smooth and effortless. I guess its like playing with a close friend. Like I said Troy knows me incredibly well. She is insightful. She certainly shocked the shit out of me with her offer. I knew she was serious too. That’s how she is. I also knew from the get go that there was no way I could win but she is so right when she says how bad I wanted it. It is hard to put into words how very badly I wanted it. Like she said it’s something I could never ask for. I just could never do that to her. It would have been such an affront and insult. But like I said she really knows me. It was such a mindfuck. I couldn’t believe what was going on and I wanted it so bad and she amped up the pain as the time went on. In the back of my mind I must have thought I had a chance but in reality I knew she could end it at any time.
Jeffrey said “To be so close and fail, it’s worse than never having been close at all.” Truthfully, no. It was really a great session. It was fun. When I finally yelled out I was half crying and half laughing. I just looked at her and I think we both knew what she had done. It was intense. Looking back its still pretty fresh. Yeah, the yearning is still there because unlike bdsm-tinged sex with an escort this would have been with someone I really care about and find incredibly powerful and sexy. It hurts to think what I could have had if I had been tougher or stronger. Looking up at her during this scene as I tried like hell to keep silent was amazing. She was so beautiful and the look on her face was something I will never forget. I have always wanted a session to stick with me but I had sought that in humiliation which never worked. This worked. It’s a painful but still a wonderful memory that keeps coming back at different times. Really good stuff.
He had no chance of winning the bet, you were not risking anything. A more interesting bet could have been as follows: you had a few hours to force him to say that he didn’t want to fuck you, if he never said that, he would have won..then he has a chance winning.. and you of losing..would you make such a bet?
@carlos
Heyyyyy. Do I know you? If so, I’ve missed you. Nice of you to stop by, even if you’re being a pill.
I wouldn’t say he had “no chance” of winning. Maybe a 15% chance. So I think I was risking something. I mean, I really meant to play fair. I didn’t want it to come to the needle in the testicles because, honestly, that would’ve felt like cheating. And there was definitely the possibility that I’d misread him and that his capacity for silence was far greater than I’d thought.
I don’t think I understand your game. What would be the motivation for him saying he *didn’t* want to fuck me? Perhaps you meant something else. But if you’re asking me if I’d make a bet with more of a chance for me to lose? The domme part of me scoffs, bewildered. What’s the point?! The competitive, game-loving part of me says, “I will still win.”
@buffalo
Thank you so much for writing all of this.
I’m curious … and maybe I shouldn’t be asking this publicly … but you say that if you’d won, it’d have been ideal since you really care for me and know me, which suggests a desire for not just sex, but the intimacy that it can engender. But what if there was nothing intimate about it? Your hands bound so you can’t touch. A towel thrown over your face so you can’t see. Your cock sheathed to insensitivity. I throw on some nipple clamps, hit your face a couple of times, ride your cock for a few minutes, don’t orgasm, dismount, and neutrally tell you to leave.
Would that be better? Or worse?
I think it still would be better just because its you. The mental connection would still be there. There would be a reality there with you that would not be present with a hooker with a whip. It would have been on a different plane any way you would have handled it. Truthfully I like your scenario. Objectified, rough, impersonal. The after feelings of something like that would be lasting I think. You have a great imagination and never cease to surprise. Interesting stuff. Good stuff.
This one is so provocative that the mere reading of it unleashes such thoughts of eroticism, anticipation, pain, and a heavenly hell denied, that it gives another meaning to Browning’s “ah, but a man’s reach should exceed his grasp, or what’s a heaven for”. You are a creative ms. indeed.
Damn Troy!! Would have loved to watch and or tag team with you on this one!! Truly hot!!
Btw – he knew you meant “him with a strap on” right? He didn’t really think he could POSSIBLY be worthy of more than that right? (grin)