There’s a thread on Max Fisch right now about people with ethnic fetishes. MVX and I were talking about how there are lots of women at Houses who’re advertised as being a particular ethnic flava of the month. Clients will call asking for a particular type and the answer’s always, “Sure, we’ve got that!” Whatever it takes to get him in the door. So, that hot Central Asian Mistress of your dreams? She’s actually Central American with artfully made up eyes. The spicy Latina with the generous hips? More like a Black Ivy Leaguer from the Bronx. It reminds me how much “domination” is really all about the fantasy for some people.
When I started at Luxuria, our receptionist, who’d previously answered phones for a prominent outcall escort service, said that callers were asking about my “nationality” and she wondered what she should say.
“Tell them I’m an American,” I said, rolling my eyes. I sighed. “I dunno, baby. As long as you don’t tell them I’m an ‘Ebony Mistress’ I don’t care. Can’t you just say I’m smart and attractive and really kinky. Isn’t that enough?”
But that’s not how it works … at least not for typical House clientèle. So we decided I’d be “French-Brazilian” because, as the receptionist pointed out, it positions me as both “classy” and “sexy” according to the stereotypes. (Why is there no eye rolling emoticon in Blogger?) One of the many reasons I’m happy not to be a House Domme anymore.
For the record, I’m not French. Or Brazilian.
But I love French food and French wine. And lately I’ve noticed in session that I tend to talk to myself, and sometimes my clients, in bits of Spanish, though that’s not quite Portuguese, it’s sorta close. About as close as I am ethnically to Brazilian.
Real life, I find, is so much more compelling than fantasy.
Remember when Donald Rumsfeld was giving the president his daily briefing. He concluded it by saying: “Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed.”
“OH NO!” the President exclaims. “That’s terrible!”
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.
Finally, the President looks up and asks, “How many is a brazillion?”
Freedom from the “Ebony” title is definitely a perk of independence!
E,
I never permitted the “ebony” modifier, even when I was at the house. It’s not, as some have alleged, that I’m ashamed of my race/ethnicity. Not at all. It’s just not something that I’ve ever felt is relevant to my being a dominant or to my practice/business. So why sell it?
There are some women, however, who DO market their race/ethnicity to clients and capitalize on the very real fetish for skin color or ethnicity. That’s great for them. (Though there’s one who famously positions herself as Latina when she’s actually Indian.)
For entirely different reasons, I get a little irritated with the “ebony” thing in the same way that I’m annoyed with “caramel.” What’s next? “Paper bag”?
French Brazilian sounds just a little bit dirty to me. Like some extra fancy kind of pubic waxing, or an exotic blowjob variant you’d see advertised on craigslist:
19 yrs old double Ds 200 roses greek/french/french brazilian outcall only
Tikanis Miss Orleans,
With me it’s my name…it’s Greek and everyone expects to see dark hair, olive complexion and a big schnoz…since I’m more of a Heinz 57 (Greek, Irish and English grandparents), I get a lot of “you’re not Greek”. “Nope not all of me anyway, does that disappoint you?”
As far as my own attracted to types, I admit to finding “non-blonde-non-blue-eyed” just that, ‘the look’ that attracts me. Don’t mean to offend anyone or present myself as having a race or enthincity fetish.
Labels are handy but they do cause frustration at times.
@MVX,
You sure do speak CL reeeallll good.
@peter,
I’m a mutt as well, born and bred, which is probably why I get so perturbed with the ethnic fetishists. Leg lovers don’t bother me nearly as much.